Today marks the fourth Mother’s Day since she we started trying to conceive. I am eternally grateful that this year I share it with my little family.
Last Mother’s Day I was completely unaware that my miracle was already growing inside me and as such, I spent the day feeling sorry for myself, laying in bed crying and wondering if I would fill the void I had in my heart and my arms.
I had no idea that only a few days later my life would change forever in the most amazing way.
On 11th May 2016 we found out we were pregnant and it’s a date I will never forget.
I wish I could truly explain to those trying to conceive the feeling but it’s just something you have to wait for, because when the time is right and it’s meant to be then it will be…. and I will be worth every tear you shed.
I endured more IVF in 12 months than some people do in 10 years, 3 x full ICSI cycles. 9 embryo transfers, all unsuccessful… only breaking between because my heart couldn’t cope anymore and my husband begged me to allow my heart to heal.
I know the heartache, but I also know the joy that follows. It’s indescribable!
Last year on Mother’s Day I truly believed I may never be a mum, it broke my heart to think that it may never happen but if that was my reality then I had to accept it. And it was only after I accepted the “whatever will be , will be” that it happened.
I had 100 people telling me “relax! It will happen” and when all you want is a baby it is the hardest thing to hear, even if it is the truth.
The advice I want to give to anyone trying to conceive is this, people don’t know how to address infertility… so they say the generic things that we probably have all been guilt of saying: “just relax” “it will happen” “go on a holiday”.
The ironic thing for me was that those words pissed me off so bad when we were experiencing infertility, yet it was when I relaxed and “let it happen” that it happened.
I know that every pregnancy is a blessing but I truly believe that when you’ve waited so long for it, you appreciate it more. You’ve fought hard to get there and it’s that little bit extra special.
Don’t ever give up! Speak up to your nearest and dearest about what you’re going through. As having that extra support makes all the difference.
And remember, I’m always here!
I cherish every moment I have with my daughter, she is almost 5 months old and every morning I wake up to her beautiful little face. I look forward to that smile when her daddy says “Good Morning My Beautiful Girl”, she smiles so hard that her eyes close a little.
This Morning my beautiful husband gifted me lovely new PJs, a gorgeous Glasshouse Candle & the most special card that I truly will treasure forever!!!!!!
We ate waffles and I drank a full mug of HOT Tea 🙌🏼 – Only Mums know how sacred this is!
I spent the afternoon with my mum, my grandmother and dinner with my inlaws.
The only tradition I want on Mother’s Day is to spend it with the ones I love. I don’t need a new bag, or expensive gift to celebrate. I want the $5 Mother’s Day Gifts that my daughter picks at school because she looked at it and thought I would love it! Even if it’s the ugliest fucking thing on offer, I’ll treasure it and show her how special I think it is because it’s a gift from my child. I want the extra kiss and cuddle from my hubby and baby. That to me is what Mother’s Day is about.
New PJs however are a great gift! Thanks Hun – feel free to keep that tradition too 😉
I know how lucky we are to have conceived naturally and had a healthy pregnancy that resulted in this beautiful girl.
No words can describe what you feel when you hear your baby laugh, or the pain in your heart when you know they’re crying in pain. You feel that shit in your soul!
The same way only a mother knows this feeling of hurt when their child is hurting, only a woman who is desperately trying to conceive knows the true torture that is another period or negative pregnancy test.
Alessia is truly the best thing to ever happen to us. I absolutely love being her mum. I love her smells, her smile, her beautiful blue eyes, her chunky thighs and little toes, her kissable lips and chubby fingers. She is my perfect little princess.
I think I’m actually obsessed with her haha and I’m pretty sure Adam is too!
A little update on Alessia:
Alessia has developed my love of sleep (and food 😝) , Alessia sleeps between 11-13 hours a night – waking once to feed. Her sleep regressed slightly at 4 months however is slowly going back to normal and she generally goes down between 8:30-9:30pm , waking between 8-9am.
Still Breastfeeding which I am loving, the bond you share when feeding your child is indescribable, to know they’re nourished by your body is an amazing feeling. I know not everyone is able to or wants to Breastfeed but I wanted to and truly love being able to do it. This is my experience.
Foods that Alessia has tried and loves are: Pumpkin, Zucchini, Carrot, Pear, Apple, Mango, Apricot, Peas, Spinach, Banana, Avocado, Sweet Potato, Broccoli.
The other day we were eating Vietnamese Bao and she was watching us eat and cracked it and screamed at me until I gave her some…. they say to give them what is on your plate, it was nothing that could hurt her, she absolutely loved it!!!!
The only thing that she hasn’t liked and it really hurt her little tummy is Rice Cereal.
As much as I want her to stay little forever I am loving watching her grow and each day gets better and better.
I cannot believe that she is almost 5 months old! Where on earth did the time go? 😩
Until Next Time x