But… Isn’t it supposed to be easy?

15 Months Ago, we first started seriously talking about babies. Its supposed to be easy isn’t it? Isn’t that what we have been “practicing” all of these years?

I’ve wanted to be a mum for as long as I can remember, I’ve never known any of the women in my family to suffer from fertility problems. So this news hit me hard!

At age 25, I was diagnosed with Endometriosis. After suffering excruciating period pain for my entire adult life, I finally listened to my girlfriends and saw a gynaecologist. He suggested laparoscopic surgery and within 12 days I was in theatre.

My doctor is one of the best in the business. He successfully removed my endometriosis and assured me I would feel better soon, i healed well and carried on life.

I just assumed that when 2 years later we decided we would like to start a family, it would just kind of happen…. Boy was I wrong!

In November 2013, we decided that after almost 10 years together and a 7 year engagement we should probably get married. We set a date – July 2014 and agreed that we should stop “not trying” to have a baby 3 months before our big day. I  was happy to be pregnant on my wedding day as I knew that with my endometriosis it might take us a while to fall pregnant naturally.

May 2014 – I stopped “the pill” and we had the mentality of whatever will be, will be..

In the past 8 months we have done so much! We opened a small business – Lucialina Pizzeria (June 2014) with my brother in law. We GOT MARRIED! (July 2014), Honeymoon (July 2014) & a spontaneous romantic Bali Holiday (October 2014). I had another Laparoscopic Surgery (December 2014) to remove endometriosis and a monster cyst that decided to call my left ovary home! My specialist also provided us with news that broke my heart… My husband was diagnosed with 99% abnormal sperm. Despite removing my endometriosis and being as fertile as I will ever be, we need to start IVF.

I cried all day when I heard the news. I felt for my husband as I knew just how much he would be hurting. Whilst he stayed strong for me, I know that it hurts him just as much as it hurts me.

The time has come for me to be strong for him. We have our first IVF meeting in a few weeks. And I have to admit – I’m shitting myself!!!!! But I want to be a mum more than anything in the world and I am willing to do whatever it takes. If that means I have to be poked and prodded then so be it.

I will continue to post our journey to Parenthood. It’s going to be an emotional ride but it’s going to be worth it.

I am so fortunate to have such an amazingly supportive husband to share my life with. He is my world and I feel so blessed to be his wife.

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But… Isn’t it supposed to be easy?

14 thoughts on “But… Isn’t it supposed to be easy?

  1. Sarita says:

    I wish you all the best and I understanding how mentally and emotionally draining it can be when you either can’t fall pregnant or you fall pregnant but keep failing to have a successful pregnancy. I’ll be following your journey and crossing my fingers and toes for you xx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Sarita , seeing your beautiful Stevie and gorgeous boys Kip & Bowie make me smile as i know that one day i will be blessed with a beautiful little family too.
      I appreciate you reading my story and following our journey x shakiera x

      Like

  2. Hey Shaks.
    My heart goes out to you. I totally know and understand the feeling.
    I too am one of those people who say ” it will happen” it’s an easy way out when I don’t really know what to say and how to say what I really want to say
    At times like this I believe it’s your faith that will get you through.
    We have had many complicated medical issues within our family so we tend to turn to faith it’s my main source of strength. I am here if you ever need to chat. And I will say a prayer for you. Xo

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Karen says:

    Wishing you nothing but the best on this journey of yours! You are probably the most resilient person I know so I have no doubt in my mind that you will get through this. You and Adam will make wonderful parents! I honestly had no idea of your situation, but I am so happy that you are able to open up about it through this blog. Stay strong, as I already know you are. Looking forward to reading up on this. I’m here if you need anything xo

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Susan says:

    Oh wow ! Ok you just told me about your blog .. And explained what a blog was Haha
    Reading it just breaks my heart . As a mum it’s hard to watch you have to struggle to have a baby and the pain it brings you both . I know you will be a fantastic mum and together be wonderful parents .. And I be a wonderful grandmother Haha . I can’t tell you it will all be ok or kiss it better but I want you to know I’m right behind you every step my love . It’s actually sad that your blog made me realize you are struggling more than I knew 😦 But I hope by writing it will be your chance to express and share the experience with others who maybe can give you advise and share stories with you . And maybe I can get some cooking tips along the way .. Bless you honey and I just want to remind you how dearly we love you . You have been my strength at times and I hope I can be there to help you find the strength to keep at it and do all you can for your dream to come true . Love & best wishes darling , Mum xo

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Sophie says:

    Goodluck with everything beautiful. I really do wish you & your husband the best of luck on this journey. Very inspiring of you to speak out so publically about this. Good things will come xxx

    Liked by 1 person

  6. jennifer says:

    Hey gorgeous…
    My heart goes out to you, knowing how much you want to be a mum..Yeah your journey will be a little tough, but you are very determined & the love between yourself and Adam, will get you both through this..you both will be in my prayers. xx

    Liked by 1 person

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